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Therapy Blog for Orem, American Fork, Spanish Fork & South Jordan
Marriage Counseling in Spanish Fork Utah
Marriage counseling in Spanish Fork Utah isn’t hard to find. Finding the right fit between you and a marriage counselor can be. It’s important to know that not every therapist is meant for you. A counselor that worked for your friends might be a good fit for them, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they are the right fit for you as well.
Most couples wait too long to come into therapy for marriage problems (Related Articles: 4 Signs You Have Marriage Problems and How To Fix Your Marriage Problems). What this means is that bad habits and painful experiences have longer to take root and damage your relationship. You will start to develop bad habits such as being your partner’s boss or interpreting them for them (Related Article: How To Communicate Effectively: Avoid These Two Common Problems In Marriage).
Orem Utah isn’t immune from relationship problems and many couples come to therapy to address them.
So, let’s talk about what to expect when coming into therapy for marriage issues. I’ve gathered this information from working with couples for nearly two decades as a marriage counselor.
You Are Going To Talk About Your Emotions
First of all, anger is not an emotion that you are going to pick up and use in marriage therapy (Related Article: Individual Therapy Tip: Anger Is A Secondary Emotion). So, be aware that marriage counseling isn’t about getting mad at each other in front of another person. You are going to talk about the primary emotion below the anger and create emotional safety for each other while doing so (Related Article: Create Emotional Safety Through Fixing Marriage Problems).
Emotional vulnerability is something that can bring you closer together and heal. A good marriage therapist will help you address both of your emotional experiences. You will both be validated in this process. You don’t have to agree with someone’s emotions. It is possible to have different emotions than your spouse. Just know that there is room for both. You might disagree with their thoughts, but you can’t disagree with what they feel (Related Article: Communication Barriers).
You will learn to recognize, feel and cope with emotions in a way that you haven’t before (Related Articles: Emotions 101: How To Be Healthy and 3 Principles Of Emotional Health). Doing this is hard, but worth it.
A Marriage Therapist Is Not A Referee
A good marriage therapist will not let you argue and then tell you who is right or wrong. They will also not set up mediation sessions where you are just negotiating and trying to get more than your partner. Rather, they will help you own your emotions and make it safe for your partner to share theirs as well.